Yep..I said it. I know I may sound slightly pessimistic but I do hate uncertainty. I should be used to it by now considering my husband and I have yet to settle on a place we want to live for longer than 4 years. As my daughter is about to start kindergarten I keep finding myself explaining to her that she will start at the elementary school here and may finish the school year somewhere else. I turned down being assistant soccer coach this fall for fear we'd move in the middle of the season. I am also looking forward to going back to work but part of me thinks "What is the point if we end up selling in a couple of months?". If we do sell it would be great NOT to have job so I can pack and deal with the closing and finding a new place. These are the thoughts that float through my head everyday. I hate uncertainty.Life is like a roller coaster- I get that. You are not suppose to have your life mapped out in front of you and know all the twists and turns that are going to be tossed in front of you. I've always prided myself on being a 'go with flow' type of person. I have a giant flaw though--I'm a secret control freak and slightly OCD. I live by lists and charts. Excel spreadsheets make me giddy and checking off my to-do list is the biggest thrill. I plan things months in advance, am not the least bit spontaneous, and hate being late.
So what does this translate in to when your daughter is about to be at school all day and you have no job and you're in the process of selling your house but still have to live life? A nightmare for someone like me. I'm sure there are others just like me out there. I'd love to hear from you just to know I'm not crazy. Letting go of control and allowing life to just lead me down the path with extreme calm is my biggest challenge. Uncertainty will not get the best of me!
Jenn - I am the same way! My husband laughs at my planning and lists. Last year the day after Tyler's birthday party he asked me what the theme was for next year! I am much happier when I have things planned out and have my lists for everything! So if you are crazy we can be crazy together. :)
ReplyDeleteHa ha! Thanks Brandi. It's nice to know I am not alone! Being so anxious because I can't set things in stone until we move is a pain for me. I don't mind change..just always want it to happen so I can get it over with.
Deletethe older i get the more i realize that the only thing you can depend on is change. I'm not great at adapting, but letting go is something I'm learning to do. There's no other option except being crazy. Ha. Interesting topic.
ReplyDeleteLeslie (aka Gwen Moss blog)
Stopping in from Mom Bloggers Club. I also have a hard time just going with the flow. I have gotten a bit better over the last few years. My husband is always asking me "Why does it matter? Why do we need to know what we are doing?" I do better with lists and a plan while he is more laid back. I like to think we are starting to even each other out.
ReplyDeleteI just signed up to be a new follower! I hope you will check me out as well.
Thanks for stopping by...I will follow you back! I don't mind the change..I just always want it to just happen and get it over with. I hate it when it's sitting there waiting and I can't do anything about it at the moment! Ha! Stop by again!
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