This past week was Kindergarten registration. Oh boy! I think I lost the last 5 1/2 years somewhere--if found, return to me please. When I quit work to stay at home with our daughter it almost seemed I had all the time in the world with her but now the months are ticking down until that first day of full day Kindergarten. By now, I guess I always anticipated we would have another child and I would just automatically be at home for another 4-5 years. However, that has not been God's plan (as frustrating as it is for us though). So now in the wake of hopefully moving back to Indy and my daughter starting full day school I have to realize that staying at home all day is just not me....I know I'd get bored to tears once all the 'to do' list stuff was done. Honestly, I never imagined myself as a stay at home mom in the first place and deep down think the work force is where I belong. The last 5 1/2 years has shown me that I need even more structure, a better routine, more adult conversation, time for myself, and accomplishments I can call my own.
I hated my job before I became a stay at home mom. Well, maybe I didn't hate my job duties as much as I hated the company (out of respect I won't name it). It had very little to do with my college major but many aspects of it I loved. Ok...I was preschool/day care teacher but I'll leave the company out of it. I loved teaching, creating art projects, writing newsletters, talking with parents, and partly running the center from time to time. The experience did show me what I hated--mainly three things:
#1- Unfortunately, teachers and day care workers get paid diddly- and that is a sad fact.
#2- I HATE being stuck in a tiny room all day. In order to simply go to the bathroom I had to call around to find another available teacher or find the Director then wait for them to come down so I could go.
#3- I am not fond of jobs where I have to try and control people all day. I know I do that now all day with my daughter--but she is my daughter and I raise her as I choose. As a teacher, you are scrutinized with every move you make and frankly, trying to control 10-20 little kids is enough for psychiatric care.
My last job also taught me things that I LOVE (which is why the job wasn't totally horrible):
#1 -- My greatest passion is creating. I was able to create display boards, newsletters, art projects, lesson plans, new games, etc.
#2- I was able to run the center from time to time and I simply loved keeping the center and employees organized, handling crisis (some hate it--I love it), giving tours of the facility, making schedules, and being able to walk around from room to room.
#3- Feeling as though I am contributing/having my own accomplishments. Yes, my daughter is my own accomplishment but every mom knows she needs something of her own outside the home.
So now my task is at hand to figure out my resume after being home for 5 years and figure out where my skills would useful and get the most out of the work aspects that I love. Figuring out what you love and hate is the first battle!
For our family the last ten years have been a roller coaster. So many obstacles, we have issues feeling settled, and we're always dreaming of more. This year is no exception. At this point in the year we are sitting in the car, buckled in, ascending slowly up and up. Here soon we'll hit the top and go zooming down to the twists, turns, and loops. I anticipate being upside down at some point and I'm sure we'll throw up sometime through it all. It will be exciting and scary but in the end we'll level out and maybe, finally, be able to get off. 
Friday was a wake up call. Friday was a little too close for comfort. Whether you live near me or on the other side of the country I am sure you heard about our tornado outbreak on Friday. Glad to say we came out of it with not even a broken tree limb to be seen. However, only 25-30 minutes from my home as well as 1.5 hours from here tornadoes have ravaged a few small towns. As our sirens went blaring in the middle of the afternoon I didn't think much of it. In my immediate area we simply got a rumble of thunder followed by a 5 minute downpour then the sun came out. Just south of here a tornado tore through leaving 13 (as of now) dead and many injured. Again I realized just how lucky we were to be alive and have our home safe and sound. Had it been about 20 miles north we could have been hit. However, I feel horrible for the people who have lost relatives, their home, and memories. If there is one thing that stands out the most about living in Indiana--Hoosier Hospitality. Those communities have come together to help each other out. Stranger helping stranger and having compassion beyond belief is what Indiana is all about. Even in my town our mayor, police officers, firefighters, hospital, and churches have stepped it up to help our neighbors that have suffered such a great loss. I am very thankful and although I shed a tear on Friday, at the time the tornadoes came through I was baking this cake for a relative. The tornadoes ripped through rural farming areas and this cake now seems only appropriate. Be thankful.
